I wasn’t starting out to do a self-portrait drawing this morning but my unconscious took me to that and I decided it felt right. This is what I’ve felt like, a bit “out of the box”, after the cochlear implant last week. They said it went very well and hopefully when they turn it on next week it will go well. I still don’t think I will make any important decisions just yet!
I was preparing for my cochlear implant surgery (see pictures above), trying to contain my fear over having surgery—especially since this is the second surgery and I know what to expect. Very unexpectedly the surgery was postponed as my surgeon was double booked, and I thought this only happened on airlines! So then looking back on my “Fear Series” I realized how unnecessary fear is because you really can’t know what will happen in the future. And now, I’m not so afraid for the surgery. It doesn’t hold the same power over me as it did before. And, it is this week, unless of course something comes up!
I attended “A Day at Djerassi” through the Northern California Women’s Caucus for Art and I saw this ear that I’m guessing is a discarded part of a sculpture and I had to take a photo of it because it so perfectly fits the journey I’ve been on recently. It was really the first time I’d been to an event since the cochlear implant surgery and I wasn’t sure how I would do with hearing in noise. But for the most part it went very well! I tested normal for hearing my last visit to the audiologist and that was fantastic news!
I have my next surgery, fortunately or unfortunately we have two ears, for the other side at the end of the month. The [Read more…]
All week I’ve been thinking about how to describe what a Cochlear Implant Sounds like through a painting, but I’ve found it incredibly hard. The sound at first seemed like an alien was talking through a translator, crisp yet fuzzy, a strange synthetic sound with some words breaking through. The strangeness persisted but then became more comprehensible. In my illustration above you see the little person standing outside the bubbles, that’s because I could hear myself twice. Simultaneously through the implant and my other ear, with a slight delay, so it sounds like an echo. The larger figure in the circle is because of the feeling of being in a tunnel. Then the colors are mostly primary because the sound felt raw. The circles should perhaps be squares but I went back and forth on that and in the end decided it was more of a round sound.
Yesterday the audiologist adjusted the sound and it is more natural, or I perceive it to be more natural. Because now I’m not so sure what normal/natural is? I also started using this little round disk that attaches directly to the implant with no ear piece, a Rondo it’s called. I was very graceful with it and after about five minutes managed to knock it off into the bathroom sink at the clinic (water running), much to my horror. I dried it out though, put a stronger magnet in it and it seems fine, now.